in loving memory: teammate, schoolmate, full time biker, friend, brother
Tuesday, March 29, 2005
Monday, March 28, 2005
my friend
just got back from koh samui yesterday. i must admit that i have an enjoyable time with so many things to see and do...but this is not im going to write about.
on the 25th of march, 2005, i lost one of my best friends. benny was on a recce trip with isaac and jocelyne to an elephant sanctuary in kuala kandah in pahang when he left all of us behind. it was ard lunchtime.
i first knew it when i was the return trip on the ferry from samui. me and xj were happily taking pictures and videos. then, a phone call from larry came to xj's phone. at the same time, i checked my phone for messages and missed calls. by now, xj was looking serious while i sensed something wrong. then i realised benny had a message sent to me.
"benny had a fatal accident.....wake is at ubi...."
"huh??" i thought. i did not know what "fatal" meant when i read the message. xj passed the phone to me in tears. then the confirmation came from larry.
for one and a half hours, i was trembling and limp on the boat....
i first knew about benny when he was playing basketball for catholic high. then we came together in SAJC with boo, frerin, jinn, herbert and winston. boo was the captain of the squad when we were in year 2 while i was the vice capt. benny was the vice vice capt while frerin was the next in line. we were always together in the morning at the basketball table, but i did not know him as well as boo and frerin as we were in different classes.
i only started to know him much better in army and university days. we have similar dreams at that point in time. the both of us just started to learn how to ride at bbdc and we often talked about the types of bike we wanted to ride. we wanted to ride harley davidsons when we get our class 2, so the choice of our first bike wasn't surprising, with me choosing a black rebel and him a chilli red daystar.
in those years, we cheong for our class 2A license but the dumb fart got suspended for driving without a license for 6 months. after finally getting his 2A bike, i jioed him to go for tours.
out first trip was to lake chini in near kuantan. it is farking far for a beginner and he only had 4 hours of sleep before that. he somehow made it through and from den on, he was hooked on motorcycle travelling.
the trip to samui was one that i had wanted to make because benny went there alone on his bike and he told me of how beautiful the place is. he was not wrong. he helped me alot on the trip, telling me to avoid this stretch of road blah blah.
it was hard to ride back after hearing such news. i initially wanted to ride all the way back to singapore, but that would take about 16 to 17 hours and i do not think i can make it, so i made a scheduled stop at hatyai. along the way, i broke down once and had to stop to let myself cry it out. i cannot comprehend losing my friend.
the next day, i rode hard so i can reach back in singapore early. i hoped that if i stained my helmet lining with my tears, i wouldnt do that at the parlour.
but when i reach the parlour, i started to tremble again. i was still in denial of the fact that he is gone until i saw his picture. den i saw him again and i cannot stop the tears.
benny had many dreams. we share many of them. we wanted to go to the angkor wat in cambodia and park our bikes there to take pictures. he wanted to get himself a BMW by mid-year and i was wiating for such a day so we can go touring together again after my exams. he was in the midst of setting up a student hostel before he went for that fateful trip.
it's unbelievable how much fun he brought to me and xj's life. the three of us went to desaru for a day ride to the beach. we had prata at jalan kayu with shirley before the four of us went to malacca for the weekend. i cannot forget how he greets us with his chin tilting upwards saying: " eh, fark u!" i cannot forget the way he drinks his kopi with his meals and how much he loves his ice cream at gelang patah esso after a long ride.
now, i have one less person to call to watch soccer with me at monkeys cafe. i cannot go and explore bike shops with him anymore looking for his next bike.
i remember just last month on a day when we went to bike shops to ogle at bikes and accessories. it was just before his fraser trip. he set his eyes on a helmet. "the first time a helmet turns me on" he said. i wished i bought that for him for his birthday. because he died of his head injuries.
benny, u farker. i dun understand why the fark u have to go first. u said u wanted to go to cambodia. den u dua me.... u were also supposed to meet boo and u still farking owe raymond money. u have so many things u haven done and u go liao... i cannot stand that u made so many pple cry.
im sure pple will tell me: "dun cry too hard. ur friend will know that u all care for him."
but u dun understand. me, boo, frerin and jinn did not lose a friend. we lost a brother.
i hope this is the last time im crying for u because u dun deserve it for dua-ing us.
but i mean my last words to u when i saw u on ur final journey this morning.
i will miss u, my brother.
on the 25th of march, 2005, i lost one of my best friends. benny was on a recce trip with isaac and jocelyne to an elephant sanctuary in kuala kandah in pahang when he left all of us behind. it was ard lunchtime.
i first knew it when i was the return trip on the ferry from samui. me and xj were happily taking pictures and videos. then, a phone call from larry came to xj's phone. at the same time, i checked my phone for messages and missed calls. by now, xj was looking serious while i sensed something wrong. then i realised benny had a message sent to me.
"benny had a fatal accident.....wake is at ubi...."
"huh??" i thought. i did not know what "fatal" meant when i read the message. xj passed the phone to me in tears. then the confirmation came from larry.
for one and a half hours, i was trembling and limp on the boat....
i first knew about benny when he was playing basketball for catholic high. then we came together in SAJC with boo, frerin, jinn, herbert and winston. boo was the captain of the squad when we were in year 2 while i was the vice capt. benny was the vice vice capt while frerin was the next in line. we were always together in the morning at the basketball table, but i did not know him as well as boo and frerin as we were in different classes.
i only started to know him much better in army and university days. we have similar dreams at that point in time. the both of us just started to learn how to ride at bbdc and we often talked about the types of bike we wanted to ride. we wanted to ride harley davidsons when we get our class 2, so the choice of our first bike wasn't surprising, with me choosing a black rebel and him a chilli red daystar.
in those years, we cheong for our class 2A license but the dumb fart got suspended for driving without a license for 6 months. after finally getting his 2A bike, i jioed him to go for tours.
out first trip was to lake chini in near kuantan. it is farking far for a beginner and he only had 4 hours of sleep before that. he somehow made it through and from den on, he was hooked on motorcycle travelling.
the trip to samui was one that i had wanted to make because benny went there alone on his bike and he told me of how beautiful the place is. he was not wrong. he helped me alot on the trip, telling me to avoid this stretch of road blah blah.
it was hard to ride back after hearing such news. i initially wanted to ride all the way back to singapore, but that would take about 16 to 17 hours and i do not think i can make it, so i made a scheduled stop at hatyai. along the way, i broke down once and had to stop to let myself cry it out. i cannot comprehend losing my friend.
the next day, i rode hard so i can reach back in singapore early. i hoped that if i stained my helmet lining with my tears, i wouldnt do that at the parlour.
but when i reach the parlour, i started to tremble again. i was still in denial of the fact that he is gone until i saw his picture. den i saw him again and i cannot stop the tears.
benny had many dreams. we share many of them. we wanted to go to the angkor wat in cambodia and park our bikes there to take pictures. he wanted to get himself a BMW by mid-year and i was wiating for such a day so we can go touring together again after my exams. he was in the midst of setting up a student hostel before he went for that fateful trip.
it's unbelievable how much fun he brought to me and xj's life. the three of us went to desaru for a day ride to the beach. we had prata at jalan kayu with shirley before the four of us went to malacca for the weekend. i cannot forget how he greets us with his chin tilting upwards saying: " eh, fark u!" i cannot forget the way he drinks his kopi with his meals and how much he loves his ice cream at gelang patah esso after a long ride.
now, i have one less person to call to watch soccer with me at monkeys cafe. i cannot go and explore bike shops with him anymore looking for his next bike.
i remember just last month on a day when we went to bike shops to ogle at bikes and accessories. it was just before his fraser trip. he set his eyes on a helmet. "the first time a helmet turns me on" he said. i wished i bought that for him for his birthday. because he died of his head injuries.
benny, u farker. i dun understand why the fark u have to go first. u said u wanted to go to cambodia. den u dua me.... u were also supposed to meet boo and u still farking owe raymond money. u have so many things u haven done and u go liao... i cannot stand that u made so many pple cry.
im sure pple will tell me: "dun cry too hard. ur friend will know that u all care for him."
but u dun understand. me, boo, frerin and jinn did not lose a friend. we lost a brother.
i hope this is the last time im crying for u because u dun deserve it for dua-ing us.
but i mean my last words to u when i saw u on ur final journey this morning.
i will miss u, my brother.
Wednesday, March 16, 2005
痛苦的人
it has come to this. the eve of the mother of all projects in this skool of mine.
from monday til now, i have been working and discussing this project non-stop. not even a break for tuition. ever since i got the video cam of mine, i have had no chance to read the manual watsoever. luckily i have had the opportunity to use it. for the project...wat else? anyway, i got some recordings of this nerdy but really good natured friend of mine facilitating a discussion in class. so i decided to write something about a friend who changed from a toad to a frog.
this guy had changed from a complete nerd to a trendy nerd ever since he joined us (me, luchang, kelvin, derrick) as a project mate. (not that we're really cool) i remember suaning him on his damn farking ugly choice of clothes to skool. imagine a crumpled t-shirt, jeans rolled up several layers at the helm just to be in line with his shoes. fark man. i can really puke. i haven mentioned that he tucks in his shirt.
so everyday in our first year, we see this malaysian kid (he's a year older than me but acts like the dongfang billy, the "young" looking auntie killer) really dressed for his part, carrying his trusty backpack to skool. when he joined into our group, i thot: "wah shiok siah. this nerd can bao all the work for me in projects. tok gong!" turns out he also another blur cock like me albeit a hardworking blur cock.
and so the group of us started to sit around in a group during lectures. now..me and derrick tend to dressed very laid back for lessons and all. and since he's so damn good to make fun of, we started to psycho him and ask him to wear slippers and berms for a change. and so the change started. first, it was berms. then he graduated to wearing sandals instead of his crappy shoes.
now, he's the most changed person in the whole of the School of design and environment. and im damn proud of him. i think the education system of singapore has done him a whole world of good in terms of his confidence. (he's still shy though..bloody gay) he even drinks kopi when facilitaing the discussion sial...farking action barbie. haha...
darn. i must be bored to talk so much about him.
anyway...here's some stuff to fulfil my egotistical self. yesterday went for the interview at KPK QS. apparently a director interviewed and he humoured me by looking through my certs and resume. den he came to the point. said that pple coming into the firm would be worked HARD (hahah...fark man..im twisted) and must commit themselves into the work, yadda yadda. the gist is: dun waste my time. i dun know what good are u but i will prob take u in cos im short of staff. so i want u to slog here a few years before u start thinking of leaving since i invested in u.
im still feeling a little lost really. the director hit the nail on its head when he said about pple who want too much of a life may not want a career in the line. problem is, the line is too much of a work. he talked about sustainability of an employee which requires a balanced life and all. dat i agree but i suspect it's more of a rarity. anyway, derrick is contracted to work there for two years..so he desperately wants a gay buddy to have lunch with him. how gay.
anyway, cool of the director to be straight forward. so the interview turned out to be more of a conversation than anything else. i have about one or two weeks to think about it before i get back to the director about whether i want to have the job. i guess the sojourn to koh samui may be a delicate exercise in clearing the mind and thinking about what i really want. whatever it is, i think this adventure would be a perfect getaway from this crowded city....
quiet time to reflect.....
from monday til now, i have been working and discussing this project non-stop. not even a break for tuition. ever since i got the video cam of mine, i have had no chance to read the manual watsoever. luckily i have had the opportunity to use it. for the project...wat else? anyway, i got some recordings of this nerdy but really good natured friend of mine facilitating a discussion in class. so i decided to write something about a friend who changed from a toad to a frog.
this guy had changed from a complete nerd to a trendy nerd ever since he joined us (me, luchang, kelvin, derrick) as a project mate. (not that we're really cool) i remember suaning him on his damn farking ugly choice of clothes to skool. imagine a crumpled t-shirt, jeans rolled up several layers at the helm just to be in line with his shoes. fark man. i can really puke. i haven mentioned that he tucks in his shirt.
so everyday in our first year, we see this malaysian kid (he's a year older than me but acts like the dongfang billy, the "young" looking auntie killer) really dressed for his part, carrying his trusty backpack to skool. when he joined into our group, i thot: "wah shiok siah. this nerd can bao all the work for me in projects. tok gong!" turns out he also another blur cock like me albeit a hardworking blur cock.
and so the group of us started to sit around in a group during lectures. now..me and derrick tend to dressed very laid back for lessons and all. and since he's so damn good to make fun of, we started to psycho him and ask him to wear slippers and berms for a change. and so the change started. first, it was berms. then he graduated to wearing sandals instead of his crappy shoes.
now, he's the most changed person in the whole of the School of design and environment. and im damn proud of him. i think the education system of singapore has done him a whole world of good in terms of his confidence. (he's still shy though..bloody gay) he even drinks kopi when facilitaing the discussion sial...farking action barbie. haha...
darn. i must be bored to talk so much about him.
anyway...here's some stuff to fulfil my egotistical self. yesterday went for the interview at KPK QS. apparently a director interviewed and he humoured me by looking through my certs and resume. den he came to the point. said that pple coming into the firm would be worked HARD (hahah...fark man..im twisted) and must commit themselves into the work, yadda yadda. the gist is: dun waste my time. i dun know what good are u but i will prob take u in cos im short of staff. so i want u to slog here a few years before u start thinking of leaving since i invested in u.
im still feeling a little lost really. the director hit the nail on its head when he said about pple who want too much of a life may not want a career in the line. problem is, the line is too much of a work. he talked about sustainability of an employee which requires a balanced life and all. dat i agree but i suspect it's more of a rarity. anyway, derrick is contracted to work there for two years..so he desperately wants a gay buddy to have lunch with him. how gay.
anyway, cool of the director to be straight forward. so the interview turned out to be more of a conversation than anything else. i have about one or two weeks to think about it before i get back to the director about whether i want to have the job. i guess the sojourn to koh samui may be a delicate exercise in clearing the mind and thinking about what i really want. whatever it is, i think this adventure would be a perfect getaway from this crowded city....
quiet time to reflect.....
Sunday, March 13, 2005
cheap sd cards? fark...
and so the weekend has come and gone.....
nothing much happened today except for reading up on the senior's work on the TBP project, and sleeping a little in the afternoon. but it was still blissful, nonetheless.
the real action came yesterday. after tuition, i went back to xj's place to pick her up. i got a few errands to run, including picking up shamen's work on the TBP project. This is critical stuff cos it could either mean a farking hell lot of work for our group or a relatively easy time for thursday's presentation. Made our way down in the early afternoon and were instantly greeted by his two hyperactive dogs. now, xj is simply terrified of these little "toy" dogs because of some bad experiences when she was younger. i could only desperately try to pin down those little buggers before they became too friendly with her. Once they were settled, we had a little conversation with shamen and his gf, meichang.
both are on their way to NIE this june. boy, do they look really happy. as if to answer me, shamen said he really loves his life right now. damn, makes me feel really jealous cos he's really living in up there. he's posted to NYJC as a PE teacher and according to many of my friends, that's one of the dream postings. being a PE teacher in a JC. u have to understand many of my friends are full blooded young men, so u have to try understand what the hell im talking about. dats right, JC girls to ogle at. in their PE attire. haha.
i heard a story of how a friend of mine, who was also posted to a JC as a PE teacher, acting really magnanimous. fancy him asking the girls to face away from his direction as they were doing push ups? muahahahah....wat the fark??!! this guy is a chain smoking, crap talking sonofa....so u can imagine my surprise at his supposed intentions.
anyway, shamen and his gf are going in at the same time as frerin. wat a coincidence. two great friends of mine going into the same course. small world indeed.
after the getting the info i needed, we made a beeline for suntec city for the IT show. remember the last post? i only wanted to spend $1 for 512 MB SD cards, if any. oh well, talk is cheap. more about that later.
the traffic to suntec was horrendous. as if the whole of singapore decided to come to the IT fair on this particular saturday. after parking my bike and getting into suntec mall itself, i realized there was an even greater crush of human bodies in there. it was a virtual standstill in some parts, something i had not experienced before except in soccer matches i attended when i was younger. xj mentioned that she experienced the same thing without airconditioning for 3 whole farking hours at the johore customs. pple were fainting, little children had to stick their poor faces into adult's arses...u get the point. i wondered what the hell would happen if there was a fire in there.
my guess? more pple would die by the crush than the fire itself. the adults were pushing and being very obnoxious (read: very cheebye). dats why deaths in congested places are usually limited to the elderly and the young, because of selfish adults pushing their way through. if ever i become a fireman, more propoganda will be communicated to malls and popular places of the need for fire escape routes and human traffic management. these pple needs education. hmmm...i think im displaying a great potential in being a fireman.
back to the IT fair. i always prefer to walk through the smaller trading companies and shops looking for cheap prices rather than checking out the big ticket companies like canon, olympus, sony, yadda yadda. looking at the prices of the thumb drives and MP3 players made me and my gf so envious of the choices now. xj bought me an MP3 player cum thumb drive (256 MB) for my birthday last year. it costs something like 200 bucks. now, u can get that sort of player at a fraction of the price! we live in exciting times indeed.
few days ago, while taking a dump, i came across a review of a MPEG4 video cam in a bike touring magazine. i was hooked. i came into the fair hoping to see if such things had come into singapore yet and wondering at sort of prices they would be sold at. for the first half hour, there were no signs of it...then it had to show up. a further half hour later, three models were being scrutinised by me and my dear. she is another techophile, even more so than me. they were sold at a pretty cheap price, even cheaper than some cameras and they dun require DV tapes. only memory cards.
so, the itchy handed me plus the pure excitement in my dear's eyes made me whip out the nets card. next item, an SD card to store more stuff. nope, they weren't $1 ones around, while the cheapest was 68 bucks, so that'll make do.
so much for the $1 SD cards. ended the day with a bottle of wine and half a chicken, while literally watching spiders fark on animal planet. (serious) ahhh...i love my life....
nothing much happened today except for reading up on the senior's work on the TBP project, and sleeping a little in the afternoon. but it was still blissful, nonetheless.
the real action came yesterday. after tuition, i went back to xj's place to pick her up. i got a few errands to run, including picking up shamen's work on the TBP project. This is critical stuff cos it could either mean a farking hell lot of work for our group or a relatively easy time for thursday's presentation. Made our way down in the early afternoon and were instantly greeted by his two hyperactive dogs. now, xj is simply terrified of these little "toy" dogs because of some bad experiences when she was younger. i could only desperately try to pin down those little buggers before they became too friendly with her. Once they were settled, we had a little conversation with shamen and his gf, meichang.
both are on their way to NIE this june. boy, do they look really happy. as if to answer me, shamen said he really loves his life right now. damn, makes me feel really jealous cos he's really living in up there. he's posted to NYJC as a PE teacher and according to many of my friends, that's one of the dream postings. being a PE teacher in a JC. u have to understand many of my friends are full blooded young men, so u have to try understand what the hell im talking about. dats right, JC girls to ogle at. in their PE attire. haha.
i heard a story of how a friend of mine, who was also posted to a JC as a PE teacher, acting really magnanimous. fancy him asking the girls to face away from his direction as they were doing push ups? muahahahah....wat the fark??!! this guy is a chain smoking, crap talking sonofa....so u can imagine my surprise at his supposed intentions.
anyway, shamen and his gf are going in at the same time as frerin. wat a coincidence. two great friends of mine going into the same course. small world indeed.
after the getting the info i needed, we made a beeline for suntec city for the IT show. remember the last post? i only wanted to spend $1 for 512 MB SD cards, if any. oh well, talk is cheap. more about that later.
the traffic to suntec was horrendous. as if the whole of singapore decided to come to the IT fair on this particular saturday. after parking my bike and getting into suntec mall itself, i realized there was an even greater crush of human bodies in there. it was a virtual standstill in some parts, something i had not experienced before except in soccer matches i attended when i was younger. xj mentioned that she experienced the same thing without airconditioning for 3 whole farking hours at the johore customs. pple were fainting, little children had to stick their poor faces into adult's arses...u get the point. i wondered what the hell would happen if there was a fire in there.
my guess? more pple would die by the crush than the fire itself. the adults were pushing and being very obnoxious (read: very cheebye). dats why deaths in congested places are usually limited to the elderly and the young, because of selfish adults pushing their way through. if ever i become a fireman, more propoganda will be communicated to malls and popular places of the need for fire escape routes and human traffic management. these pple needs education. hmmm...i think im displaying a great potential in being a fireman.
back to the IT fair. i always prefer to walk through the smaller trading companies and shops looking for cheap prices rather than checking out the big ticket companies like canon, olympus, sony, yadda yadda. looking at the prices of the thumb drives and MP3 players made me and my gf so envious of the choices now. xj bought me an MP3 player cum thumb drive (256 MB) for my birthday last year. it costs something like 200 bucks. now, u can get that sort of player at a fraction of the price! we live in exciting times indeed.
few days ago, while taking a dump, i came across a review of a MPEG4 video cam in a bike touring magazine. i was hooked. i came into the fair hoping to see if such things had come into singapore yet and wondering at sort of prices they would be sold at. for the first half hour, there were no signs of it...then it had to show up. a further half hour later, three models were being scrutinised by me and my dear. she is another techophile, even more so than me. they were sold at a pretty cheap price, even cheaper than some cameras and they dun require DV tapes. only memory cards.
so, the itchy handed me plus the pure excitement in my dear's eyes made me whip out the nets card. next item, an SD card to store more stuff. nope, they weren't $1 ones around, while the cheapest was 68 bucks, so that'll make do.
so much for the $1 SD cards. ended the day with a bottle of wine and half a chicken, while literally watching spiders fark on animal planet. (serious) ahhh...i love my life....
Saturday, March 12, 2005
work, work and more work
just found out my dear has a blog of her own. and hence the cavalry has a queen.
the past days were hectic. because of...more projects. i thought the worst has gone, that the IP is a remnant of my study life. then came along the silent killer. a project that all of us agreed was much more difficult than the IP.
the whole of yesterday's afternoon was spent on the University Cultural Centre, hoping that we can get building plans AND a walkthrough of the building. then, at the end of it, all came to naught. building plans were not to be given out cos pple like LKY come by once in a while to answer stupid questions posed by our brilliant undergrads. so security concerns brought our afternoon to a waste.
today. supposed to meet a senior later to get his report for that dreaded project. hopefully it's comprehensive enough to allow us to get by, cos the first group that had their presentation were farked by the lecturer. sibeh sian...even the other lecturers know about it. so pressure pressure...and thursday afternoon is D day H hour.
going to the IT show later as well. nope, i dun have money to buy the latest gadgets but it's a guy's thing u know. luckily my dear likes these things as well. i just hope they sell $1 512MB SD cards, then at least i can get away with something. heh.
two more weeks to koh samui. i cant wait. the stupid project just makes it even more sweet, though it aint over yet. i gotta change a couple of stuff on the bike, namely my fuel pump who's reaching the end of its life soon. i got a glimpse of what could happen in thailand when i got stuck two nights ago. my reserve light somehow decided to fark up on me and thus left me spending an hour in a dark, scary part of a malaysian highway. now, im a careful person and i do check my mileage as well as a backup. just happened that i accidently reset my tripmeter before that. a series of unfortunate events, yes. hopefully, that wun happen in thailand. (read more about the dark road in enedfea's entry)
thanks to jeremy aka a sai la for helping us out. he's a friend indeed....
the past days were hectic. because of...more projects. i thought the worst has gone, that the IP is a remnant of my study life. then came along the silent killer. a project that all of us agreed was much more difficult than the IP.
the whole of yesterday's afternoon was spent on the University Cultural Centre, hoping that we can get building plans AND a walkthrough of the building. then, at the end of it, all came to naught. building plans were not to be given out cos pple like LKY come by once in a while to answer stupid questions posed by our brilliant undergrads. so security concerns brought our afternoon to a waste.
today. supposed to meet a senior later to get his report for that dreaded project. hopefully it's comprehensive enough to allow us to get by, cos the first group that had their presentation were farked by the lecturer. sibeh sian...even the other lecturers know about it. so pressure pressure...and thursday afternoon is D day H hour.
going to the IT show later as well. nope, i dun have money to buy the latest gadgets but it's a guy's thing u know. luckily my dear likes these things as well. i just hope they sell $1 512MB SD cards, then at least i can get away with something. heh.
two more weeks to koh samui. i cant wait. the stupid project just makes it even more sweet, though it aint over yet. i gotta change a couple of stuff on the bike, namely my fuel pump who's reaching the end of its life soon. i got a glimpse of what could happen in thailand when i got stuck two nights ago. my reserve light somehow decided to fark up on me and thus left me spending an hour in a dark, scary part of a malaysian highway. now, im a careful person and i do check my mileage as well as a backup. just happened that i accidently reset my tripmeter before that. a series of unfortunate events, yes. hopefully, that wun happen in thailand. (read more about the dark road in enedfea's entry)
thanks to jeremy aka a sai la for helping us out. he's a friend indeed....
Wednesday, March 09, 2005
fark things
im facing something of a dilemma. last week, derrick's parent company sent a greeting to him and asked for recommendations for more vacancies in his company. by virtual of being there when he opened the mailbox, he asked me whether i wanted to try for it. there, the selection headaches start.
4 years of relak studying in NUS is gonna bring me a degree with honours. seriously, this is a 3 year course spread into 4. so, all the crap im studying is either gonna be put to good use or vanish into the thin air if i decide to be a housewife of singapore. to be honest, i dun know what prospects are there in both choices. being a QS (quantity surveyor, u arses) in a consultant firm may be a stepping stone to employment in sectors which im interested in, namely project management, safety and facilities management. BUT, i have this crappy feeling that what i have studied wun be put into too much use. "why?" u ask. Cos there aint many buildings to be built, stupid! either that, or the salary may stay measly till the end of my life. how pathetic. another scenario: is that i become a shining star in the firm. impressing the bosses with my witty, charming presence in presentations and careful work. this may lead me to rising high up in the firm and thus effectively pulling my salary up with me. from here, i have a choice of either staying in the firm or going for greener pastures. if i can finish a Masters during the time in the firm, the switch to a govt agency would be extremely encouraging. monetarily, at least. full blown satisfaction, at most.
i seriously doubt the second scenario. but hey! a pretty cool fantasy from my half awaken mind in bed.
in the scdf, i go on to be a senior officer, getting a paycheck of 2800 buckaroos from the time i graduate from a 9 month course. in three to 4 years, i could be drawing much much more. also, the satisfaction of doing a good deed is overwhelming. hahah..must be remnants from my primary school boy scout. "a good deed every day!" perks are plentiful, to say the least. the worst, hmmm...mabbe my life? another scenario, as contributed by boo: u get to see fark things everyday! now, different pple have different appetite for the grosteque...a headless body may be easy to fanthom for some, while not for others. boo's valuable contribution: see rotten.com everyday! (in case u really wanna see that fark site, think of faces of death...u get the picture)
ahh...my mum is pretty cool about this. it's my choice anyway. but somehow, more assurance is needed. til then, let me ponder.........
4 years of relak studying in NUS is gonna bring me a degree with honours. seriously, this is a 3 year course spread into 4. so, all the crap im studying is either gonna be put to good use or vanish into the thin air if i decide to be a housewife of singapore. to be honest, i dun know what prospects are there in both choices. being a QS (quantity surveyor, u arses) in a consultant firm may be a stepping stone to employment in sectors which im interested in, namely project management, safety and facilities management. BUT, i have this crappy feeling that what i have studied wun be put into too much use. "why?" u ask. Cos there aint many buildings to be built, stupid! either that, or the salary may stay measly till the end of my life. how pathetic. another scenario: is that i become a shining star in the firm. impressing the bosses with my witty, charming presence in presentations and careful work. this may lead me to rising high up in the firm and thus effectively pulling my salary up with me. from here, i have a choice of either staying in the firm or going for greener pastures. if i can finish a Masters during the time in the firm, the switch to a govt agency would be extremely encouraging. monetarily, at least. full blown satisfaction, at most.
i seriously doubt the second scenario. but hey! a pretty cool fantasy from my half awaken mind in bed.
in the scdf, i go on to be a senior officer, getting a paycheck of 2800 buckaroos from the time i graduate from a 9 month course. in three to 4 years, i could be drawing much much more. also, the satisfaction of doing a good deed is overwhelming. hahah..must be remnants from my primary school boy scout. "a good deed every day!" perks are plentiful, to say the least. the worst, hmmm...mabbe my life? another scenario, as contributed by boo: u get to see fark things everyday! now, different pple have different appetite for the grosteque...a headless body may be easy to fanthom for some, while not for others. boo's valuable contribution: see rotten.com everyday! (in case u really wanna see that fark site, think of faces of death...u get the picture)
ahh...my mum is pretty cool about this. it's my choice anyway. but somehow, more assurance is needed. til then, let me ponder.........
snooze
two panadol extras and two normal ones later, my fever evaporates into thin air...finally.
i hate getting sick. i wanted to get sick a lot when i was young cos i wanted to skip skool but not now especially when i have the freedom of skipping lessons. wats worse, was that i was soooo bored at home that i can only sleep myself to death. i slept so much that i couldn't sleep on monday night. and that farked up fever still didn't go away. hence the addition of two more normal strength panadols.
thus nothing much happened. but i want to write about the absolutely brilliant match between chelsea and barcelona. that was one of the best matches i ever seen in my life. i simply couldn't fall asleep drooling on my pillow with all the audible "wah!!" and "oohss!" during the match. (from me, dat is) i guess sleeping myself to death for the past two days helped a little. heh. the final score is 4 -2 in favour of chelsea, but it wasn't that the defending was bad or anything..but simply two teams of great footballers earning their obscence amount of money with great skill and flair.
oh well, pretty boring when ur sick, innit? nothing much to write about...think i just head back home for 40 winks...kekek..
i hate getting sick. i wanted to get sick a lot when i was young cos i wanted to skip skool but not now especially when i have the freedom of skipping lessons. wats worse, was that i was soooo bored at home that i can only sleep myself to death. i slept so much that i couldn't sleep on monday night. and that farked up fever still didn't go away. hence the addition of two more normal strength panadols.
thus nothing much happened. but i want to write about the absolutely brilliant match between chelsea and barcelona. that was one of the best matches i ever seen in my life. i simply couldn't fall asleep drooling on my pillow with all the audible "wah!!" and "oohss!" during the match. (from me, dat is) i guess sleeping myself to death for the past two days helped a little. heh. the final score is 4 -2 in favour of chelsea, but it wasn't that the defending was bad or anything..but simply two teams of great footballers earning their obscence amount of money with great skill and flair.
oh well, pretty boring when ur sick, innit? nothing much to write about...think i just head back home for 40 winks...kekek..
Monday, March 07, 2005
the runner
oh man...wat a way to start off the week...i had grandiose plans on reading my lecture notes, having a jog around my neighbourhood, having a haircut, giving tuition at the end of the day and a nice hug from my dear at the end of it all. but no.my farking nose decided to act up again resulting in a severely clogged left nose with sinus dripping down into my throat, causing an irritaing sore throat.
alright, a recap on the events leading to this sinus overflowing event. Friday morning. went to play soccer with the guys and boo. i think we were all freaking unfit. no strength to run ard and chase balls. end up some pple just take the ball and run all the way la, anyhow pass la, dun want to defend la...sibeh sian. but hey! at least i ran ard..hahah...the blissfulness of being a dork. runing ard in a soccer game feels like i've completed a marathon. mind you, it's monday today, and my legs still feel farking suan. like i just played a champions league final yesterday.
but i admit. much of the pain is my fault. in the enthusiasm of finally kicking a ball, i forgot all about warmups. and stretching. now i know why my bball coaches always focuses on warmups. when we were younger, we could run marathons every alternate day. now, i think every alternate month. i can also feel for those premier league soccer guys. playing so many competitive matches in a space of a few days. respect.
anyway, after the game, went for lunch with boo. and headed back home for a rest of 20 mins. man, i so felt like sleeping but i have a site visit at ang mo kio later..and i dun have petrol liao. so lan lan, went to second link for top up and headed down to AMK. at this point in time, i would like to up my gross factor up a bit. at the end of the game, realised have two 20 cents sized blisters on both my legs. at the balls of the feet there....i never seen such bloatedness before man...there must be a lot of liquid swirling in there, cushioning my feet from the relentless impact.
at AMK, greeted by this really friendly uncle who is supposed to be a vice president for project management in the newly privatised HDB corp. he was the one guiding us thru our project and helping us a hell lot. really appreciated. i think my friend's mum, who is a colleague of his, helped somewhat. ahh...how diplomatic. then went ard for a walk. the safety officer and me got along really well. i think im more of a site person than an office one. talking cock to hands-on person beats talking about development problems in upgrading projects, aint it?
night came, and the kruzer soft launch is about to start. must thank frerin for paying my parking fine for me in that tight period of time. was looking for AXS and SAM machines to pay off my fine. but when i tried to pay, the farking machine cant read my card. so thanks man...otherwise,i might kena more summon...hahah.
soft launch was fine, the return of my dear from jakarta was better. she joined me straight from the airport..den we went for a ride...to the end of the day.. oh ya..i think xj saw christopher lee and fann wong along upper thomson road..and so did some of the guys...shit man..i concentrated on the road so much that i missed it..
sat and sun flew past...had a little lover's tiff, catched howl's moving castle (pretty romantic movie) and here i am...stuffy nose and all...my legs still feel freaking tired and painful..but i have the satisfaction of knowing that, at least, i ran.
alright, a recap on the events leading to this sinus overflowing event. Friday morning. went to play soccer with the guys and boo. i think we were all freaking unfit. no strength to run ard and chase balls. end up some pple just take the ball and run all the way la, anyhow pass la, dun want to defend la...sibeh sian. but hey! at least i ran ard..hahah...the blissfulness of being a dork. runing ard in a soccer game feels like i've completed a marathon. mind you, it's monday today, and my legs still feel farking suan. like i just played a champions league final yesterday.
but i admit. much of the pain is my fault. in the enthusiasm of finally kicking a ball, i forgot all about warmups. and stretching. now i know why my bball coaches always focuses on warmups. when we were younger, we could run marathons every alternate day. now, i think every alternate month. i can also feel for those premier league soccer guys. playing so many competitive matches in a space of a few days. respect.
anyway, after the game, went for lunch with boo. and headed back home for a rest of 20 mins. man, i so felt like sleeping but i have a site visit at ang mo kio later..and i dun have petrol liao. so lan lan, went to second link for top up and headed down to AMK. at this point in time, i would like to up my gross factor up a bit. at the end of the game, realised have two 20 cents sized blisters on both my legs. at the balls of the feet there....i never seen such bloatedness before man...there must be a lot of liquid swirling in there, cushioning my feet from the relentless impact.
at AMK, greeted by this really friendly uncle who is supposed to be a vice president for project management in the newly privatised HDB corp. he was the one guiding us thru our project and helping us a hell lot. really appreciated. i think my friend's mum, who is a colleague of his, helped somewhat. ahh...how diplomatic. then went ard for a walk. the safety officer and me got along really well. i think im more of a site person than an office one. talking cock to hands-on person beats talking about development problems in upgrading projects, aint it?
night came, and the kruzer soft launch is about to start. must thank frerin for paying my parking fine for me in that tight period of time. was looking for AXS and SAM machines to pay off my fine. but when i tried to pay, the farking machine cant read my card. so thanks man...otherwise,i might kena more summon...hahah.
soft launch was fine, the return of my dear from jakarta was better. she joined me straight from the airport..den we went for a ride...to the end of the day.. oh ya..i think xj saw christopher lee and fann wong along upper thomson road..and so did some of the guys...shit man..i concentrated on the road so much that i missed it..
sat and sun flew past...had a little lover's tiff, catched howl's moving castle (pretty romantic movie) and here i am...stuffy nose and all...my legs still feel freaking tired and painful..but i have the satisfaction of knowing that, at least, i ran.
Friday, March 04, 2005
the beginning of the end
ahhh..a can of ice cool beer in one hand at the end of the day. the perfect finish to a tiring end of the integrated project.
four days of staying in skool to complete a project said to involve all that we've learnt in the 4 years in undergrad skool comes to this presentation of sorts. and it's all pretty anti-climatical really. cos it aint as serious as i thought it would be. ahh well, at least this drag ass piece of shit is over.
xj has gone to jakarta for some work so im pretty much sian after each day. yesterday was particularly tiring cos we stayed till 11pm but boo called and jioed me for karaoke. being addicted to it recently, i just went and let my hair down. boy, it felt good! having boo and frerin shouting out along when we're singing songs is really uplifting. ah shit, i sense some gayness again. anyway, tried to finish the session with "staying alive", a helium-assisted song by the beegees. what we got was terence and philips version of "staying alive". muahahaha....
then we choose our song, "the ending of loneliness" by "5 month day". (literal translation) damn power song. all the headbanging, jumping around and silly dances chut kar liao.
well. that was the only highlight in a dreary week of project. at least my project mates and old friends cheered up the mood somewhat since my dear is away. hmmm....next activity...soccer at 930 later!!!! woohooo...my skool life is ending...
four days of staying in skool to complete a project said to involve all that we've learnt in the 4 years in undergrad skool comes to this presentation of sorts. and it's all pretty anti-climatical really. cos it aint as serious as i thought it would be. ahh well, at least this drag ass piece of shit is over.
xj has gone to jakarta for some work so im pretty much sian after each day. yesterday was particularly tiring cos we stayed till 11pm but boo called and jioed me for karaoke. being addicted to it recently, i just went and let my hair down. boy, it felt good! having boo and frerin shouting out along when we're singing songs is really uplifting. ah shit, i sense some gayness again. anyway, tried to finish the session with "staying alive", a helium-assisted song by the beegees. what we got was terence and philips version of "staying alive". muahahaha....
then we choose our song, "the ending of loneliness" by "5 month day". (literal translation) damn power song. all the headbanging, jumping around and silly dances chut kar liao.
well. that was the only highlight in a dreary week of project. at least my project mates and old friends cheered up the mood somewhat since my dear is away. hmmm....next activity...soccer at 930 later!!!! woohooo...my skool life is ending...
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